Friday, October 26, 2012

The gardener and the muffin



My wife, Katherine, is an exceptionally kind and caring person.

That's why when Geoff, our elderly gardener who attends to our plants twice a year, comes to visit us, Katherine wants to be nice to him.

"Nice", means giving Geoff his coffee and a muffin.

Geoff comes very early so I get-up to get Geoff organised and am asked by Katherine to give Geoff his coffee and m...
uffin; home made muffin that is!!

Half an hour later I am in my study at the computer, Geoff is working in the garden, and a voice is heard from the top of the landing near our bedroom. The conversation went like this....

K: Taylor (my affectionate name). Did you give Geoff his coffee?
R: Yes, my love
K: Did you put milk in it?
R: Sure did my love.
K: And one sugar?
R: Yep. All good.
K: Did you give him a nice muffin on a plate.
R: Yes, my love. He has just eaten it. The muffin that is. Not the plate!
K: Great. Did you heat the muffin up first?

(OMG!!! WHAT DID SHE JUST ASK?? DID I H E A T THE MUFFIN??).

Panic. God. Do people ever HEAT muffins...do you??

K: Taylor, did you hear me? Did you warm the muffin first as Geoff likes his muffins warm.
R: Sorry, dear. Just on the phone. (Think, man, think!).

With only one option open before I am thrashed, I approached Geoff and asked him if the muffin was Ok?

G: Mmmm. OK. Bit it was cold.

Geez, why do we get old blokes to do the garden? Younger guys are easier. Just give them a beer. Stuff the muffins!

As my wife wonders down the stairs my car is pulling-out. I am on-the-run.

Stuff it. I am going for a surf. Nice waves too.

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